Anyone who has ever received a useless class action settlement will appreciate this story from the California Civil Justice Blog:

A southern California attorney who brought a class action against a clothes retailer will be paid $125,000 for his legal services -- in gift cards.

Yorba Linda attorney Neil B. Fineman brought a class action lawsuit against Windsor Fashions, alleging the company was committing routine violations of the Song-Beverly Credit Card Act, according to the Metropolitan News-Enterprise.

Per the settlement agreement, class members won't receive cash, only a $10 gift card. Los Angeles Superior Court Judge Brett Klein also provided that Fineman will be paid his fee with "12,500 ten-dollar Windsor Fashions gift cards."

The lawyer is to get 3,500 of those cards by next Monday and 750 of them on the third day of each month through January of next year. The named plaintiff, Jacqueline Cohen, will garner 250 of the gift cards as an "incentive reward" for leading the charge....

The Civil Justice Association of California salutes the judge for his innovation. In many class action cases, the lawyers walk away with millions -- in real dollars, while the class members receive coupons.

Same-sex marriage is much in the thoughts of me and other like-minded Californians excited about its upcoming legalization. Here are some items on that theme.

Defenders of Marriage song

I heard this song on the radio tonight on This Way Out. For those who don't want to listen to it on YouTube, here are some of the lyrics:

Every time we think about same-sex marriage
Makes us sick to our guts
I mean, two people who want to commit to a
stable monogamous life-long relationship
What are they, nuts?
It's unnatural!
Now a man should not lie with a
person who is a guy
He should only lie to his wife,
the bible is clear

Homosexuality is a choice?

Opponents of gay rights often claim that homosexuality is a choice. Let's think about that for a moment...

Anyone who makes that claim is implying that they consciously chose not to be homosexual, presumably due to their moral superiority. If these people were only attracted to members of the opposite sex, however, they wouldn't have needed to make such a choice. Thus, they're unwittingly making a confession about their own sexual orientation.

Flashback to 2004

Here's a reprint of my February 2004 email to family and close friends about my experiences around San Francisco's unilateral (later overturned) decision to allow same-sex marriages:

As you may know, San Francisco has been allowing gay couples to marry over this holiday weekend. As you may also know, Keith and I support gay marriage. I want to share with you how this has touched our lives. I know not all of you support gay marriage, but I know you support hospitality and standing up for what one believes in, even if you choose different causes.

Saturday, which was Valentine's Day, Keith and I stocked up on tchochkes and headed to City Hall in our little electric car. There was a huge line of people waiting for marriage licenses. We went down the line, giving out Hershey's kisses ("A kiss for the bride?"), champagne ("genuine Trader Joe's"), fancy-schmancy picture frames, and our best wishes. I loved Keith more than ever, seeing him heartily congratulating brides and grooms (which, analytical as always, I figured he wouldn't do if he regretted his state of matrimony). We spoke with a reporter from New York Newsday. After giving our names, I told her that Keith and I were married -- that the (temporary and local) legalization of gay marriage hadn't destroyed ours. We weren't quoted in the article; instead, the writer focused on the celebrants, which I think was appropriate.

Sunday morning, I went shopping again for more goodies, including some rainbow candles from the Castro. Unfortunately, the store that sold same-sex cake toppers wasn't open yet. Keith and I went to City Hall in the afternoon. After hearing a bride talk about her Jewish wedding at her grandmother's nursing home, I gave her a pair of big rainbow candles for Shabbos (Sabbath) and mentioned how Keith and I couldn't marry either under strict Jewish law. While we were able to give away all the candles and drinks, there were so many people handing out snacks that we went home with chocolate kisses.

That evening, I read online about people camping out at City Hall so they could be sure of getting married the next day. I made another trip out, with blankets and sweaters, because it was a wet chilly night. When I got home, Keith melted down the leftover chocolate kisses and made us warm chocolate pudding. Yum!

On Monday, I showed up at City Hall at 9:30 to volunteer inside, but they had more than enough people, and I was turned away, despite professing computer expertise. After getting over my disappointment, I assisted people who were handing out coffee, food (bagels and doughnuts), and stickers, and asked people in line what else they needed. I wasn't able to help with the request for a catheter, but I was able to come back later with dry socks and gloves, which were appreciated. By this time, some people in line recognized me, either from previous days or repeated appearances that day.

Everyone expects the courts to issue an injunction today stopping the granting of marriage licenses. We don't know whether this weekend's marriages will be voided. In any case, it will be the start of a state-wide and federal legal battle. For the friends of ours who married this weekend and didn't get a present from us, we'll make a donation to a legal fund in their honor.

I know that several of you participated in the Civil Rights movement. I'm proud and happy that I was able to participate in San Francisco's civil disobedience and civil rights movement.

Historical note: The weddings were halted by court order on March 11, 2004, and legally voided on August 12, 2004 [1].

Star Trek inspirational posters

Background: My husband Keith is a coffee addict, and I try to remember to accomodate him on our morning commute. (We don't have a coffee maker at home.)

Ellen (while driving car): Would you like me to stop at the coffee shop?
Keith: Yes, that would be great, although it's not necessary. I could jump out of the car while it's moving.

According to the [Los Angeles] Daily News via woot, real estate marketing has moved beyond staged decor and on to staged families.

Dallas-based Centex built four model homes, filled them with furniture, then took things one bizarre step further. The company hired four actors to play the role of a family, in a role that's half improv, half sales demo...

"Where does the reality end and the ... good God, reality begin?" mused Jim Garfield, a senior publicist for ... [the] public relations company that created Home Life.

On a positive note, the family is multi-racial.

It's been a while since I posted anything. Here are some things that amused me around San Francisco.

AAA Battery Delivery and Installation

I saw a truck painted with "AAA Battery Delivery and Installation". I commented to Keith that I thought everyone knew how to install triple-A batteries themselves.

Café Gratitude

A student and friend recently took me to lunch at Café Gratitude, a vegan raw food restaurant whose menu proclaims:

Café Gratitude is our expression of a world of plenty. Our food and people are a celebration of our aliveness. We select the finest organic ingredients to honor the earth and ourselves, as we are one and the same. We support local farmers, sustainable agriculture and environmentally friendly products. Our food is prepared with love.

We invite you to step inside and enjoy being someone who chooses: loving your life, adoring yourself, accepting the world, being generous and grateful everyday, and experiencing being provided for. Have fun and enjoy being nourished. Welcome to Café Gratitude.

The dish names are all inspirational. I ordered "I AM SENSATIONAL" (pesto pizza) and "I AM EFFERVESCENT" (house ginger ale), which were affirmed back to me by the waiter ("You are sensational and effervescent"). The food was delicious, the service warm, and the prices reasonable, and I plan to return, but I also can't help laughing at myself and thinking: "Only in San Francisco".

Systemic Discrimination

I am currently sunburned, despite liberal application of sunscreen before yesterday's Commencement at Mills College. I always joke that the outdoor ceremony is an example of systemic discrimination against faculty not of color.

Australian article via fark:

QANTAS chairman Margaret Jackson was suspected of being a terrorist and frisked during a visit to the US last year. The airport security guard who checked her was reluctant to believe that a woman could be the head of an airline.

Mrs Jackson said yesterday her briefcase was searched after she went through a security check at Los Angeles airport.

Among her documents were detailed plans of new aircraft, including cross-section diagrams showing seat layouts.

"The guy said 'Why have you got all of this?'," she told the Herald Sun.

"And I said, 'I'm the chairman of an airline. I'm the chairman of Qantas'. And this black guy, who was, like, eight foot tall, said, 'But you're a woman'."....

After proving her identity, Mrs Jackson produced paper with her letterhead on it and wrote a note to the guard, whose name was Bill.

"And I wrote, 'Dear Bill, this is from the chairman of Qantas, who is a woman'."

This reminds me of a 1989 article about women at technical conferences, which I first excerpted in a report about women in computer science:

[PFS Inc. president Mary] Rich remembers attending the National Computer Conference (NCC), a now-defunct computer convention, where the male attendees outnumbered the female ones by a ratio of 300 to 1. Convention officials as well as hotel staffs were extremely suspicious of single women, Rich said. Women were often suspected of being prostitutes trying to solicit show attendees. Rich said she once tried to go to the hotel room of a colleague for a drink only to be kicked out by security when trying to get in an elevator.

Rich, who co-chaired the 1986 NCC with another woman, said that as recently as three years ago one of the primary concerns was how women were being treated at the show. `We still had problems with security not believing [the credentials of] women trying to get onto the show floor,' she said [LaPlante 1989].

This picture was taken at the progressive Modern Times Bookstore. I was amused at the juxtaposition of the criticisms of capitalism next to the iPod guide:

I found this no-parking sign interesting:

Presumably, the "toxic treats" sign does not describe the food being sold at this Mission convenience store:

On the political front, the progressive San Francisco Bay Guardian criticized a candidate for local office by saying "he talks more about enforcing the law than soaking the rich". Uh, I thought we wanted the rule of law. My mistake.